The Perfect Ham Sandwich

How do you define gourmet? It sorta rolls off the tongue: Gourmet. GooooooRR-Mayyyyyyy. Sounds delicious. And for the perfect ham sandwich, gourmet mustard is a must. It adds that spice and flavor that makes its it so mouthwatering.

grey poupon country dijon mustard

Ham Sandwich with Gourmet Mustard

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of smoked ham, a fresh hoagie bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard.

The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the picnic table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands, and was ready for the first, mouthwatering bite.

Suddenly I was stopped by my wife with a sense of urgency.

"Hold Joshua while I get my sandwich," she said.  (Joshua was six months old).

I carefully balanced him between my left elbow and shoulder, and began reaching for my perfect ham sandwich again, when I noticed a streak of that gourmet mustard on my fingers.

I love mustard. I really love gourmet mustard!

I had no napkin.

I did what comes natural. I licked it off.

It was not mustard.

No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later (after she stopped crying from laughing so hard), my wife said,

"Now you know why they call that mustard 'Poupon'.

boy with hands over eyes

How About Some Dessert with that Ham Sandwich?

man eating wide eyed

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