Bachelor food questions. It is okay to eat food in the refrigerator if the hair growing on it is green? How can you tell the difference between raisins and bugs? As a bachelor, is it okay to eat raw beef from the fridge instead of wasting time making the stove or oven hot?
A Bachelor's Guide to Food
Sesame or Poppy seeds are the only acceptable "spots" that should be seen on bread.
If you can take it out of it's container and bounce it on the floor, it has gone bad.
When something starts pecking it's way out of the shell, the egg is probably past it's prime.
Putting empty containers back into the refrigerator is an old trick, but it only works if you live with someone or have a maid.
General Rule of Thumb:
Most food cannot be kept longer than the average life span of a hamster. Keep a hamster in or near your refrigerator to gauge this.
Bachelor Chicken Recipe
- Take 2 frozen chicken breasts from the freezer
- Place on a glass plate (because a paper plate will leak through)
- Pour a heaping helping of barbecue sauce over both pieces of chicken
- Set the plate in the microwave and turn it to "HIGH"
- The loud bang from the microwave means it's ready
- Serve with leftover potato chips
Bachelor Pizza Recipe
- Take the frozen Red Baron Pizza® from the freezer
- Turn the over to 400 degrees Fahrenheit
- Put the pizza on the center rack
- Listen for the sizzle
- Remove the pizza from the oven when it starts to smoke
- (It's a good idea to have a small fire extinguisher at the ready)
- Serve with cold brewski, cerveza fria, or ein bier, depending on your location
- Can of pinto beans
- Bag of graded cheese
- Jar of Pace Picante Sauce®
- Leftover cooked hamburger (scrape off the stuck on bun and pickles)
- Large flour tortillas
- Put the pinto beans and hamburger in the microwave (in a dish!)
- Put the tortillas on a Flat skillet over low heat - Yep! Gotta be LOW HEAT
- Turn the tortillas, pull 'em apart, rotate them while the microwave runs
- Dump the hot beans and hamburger onto the tortillas
- Add cheese and picante sauce (and habaneros if you love them!)
- Try really hard to roll 'em up - closed
- Clean up the stove, microwave, counter, and floor, later. Much later.
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