Broken Lawn Mower Story

When does a broken lawn mower become much more than just a mower? How could a broken lawn mower become a point of contention for a happily married couple? After all, it's just a piece of machinery. Or is it?  When does it become the central flashpoint between a man and a woman?

Our Lawn Mower Broke, What Could I Do?

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, playing golf - always something more important to me.

lawn mower accident

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.

When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.

I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.

I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."

        (Wait for it)

                (Just a little more)

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.  (Ba Da Bing) 

Martial Harmony

As the young married couple were driving across the state to a family get together, there was some discussion about the importance of making the trip.

Mike:  "Tell me why we're spending all this time to see your parents when we just saw them last month over the holidays?"

Janice:  "We've been through all of this before. We want to keep the extended family connected, even if we live 245 miles apart."

Mike:  "I understand that part, but again, we just saw them for crying out loud!"

Janice:  "Don't take that tone of voice with me Michael Raymond!"

Mike: "Oh, so it's Michael Raymond now! Whew!!"

Janice:  "That's it, you're impossible!!!"


woman driving classic car

More Silence.

As they continued to drive, it was necessary to move off the Interstate on to County Highway D. A few miles farther down the two lane road, they approached a farm. The aroma. Okay. The ODOR, was powerful. The smell of pigs, goats, and donkeys met them before the farm came into sight around a curve in the road. As they drove past the farm looking at the animals, the silence was broken:

Mike:  "Relatives of yours Janice?"

Janice:  "Why yes Mike, thanks for asking. They're my In-Laws!"

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