Blind Retail Associate

There is much documentation and study to support how keen our other senses become if we lose one. Folks that are blind, often develop their senses of smell and hearing well beyond averages of people with full eyesight. Experience is also a teacher. Never underestimate someone who is blind, or a grandmama.

Amazing Powers of Observation

A woman goes into a large retail chain store to buy a rod and reel for her grandson. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the register. There is an "associate" standing there with dark shades on. She says, Excuse me sir ..... can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"

He says , "Ma'am I'm blind but if you drop it on the counter I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound that it makes."

She didn't believe him, but dropped it on the counter anyway. He said "That's a 6' graphite rod with Zebco 404 reel and 8 lb. test line......It's a good all around rod and reel and it's $20.00."

dad and son fishingShe says, "That's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I think it's what I'm looking for so I'll take it"

He walks behind the counter to the register. The woman opens her purse and drops her wallet while reaching for a credit card. When she bends down to pick it up, she unintentionally passes gas.

At first she is embarrassed but then realizes that there is no way he could tell it was her ... being blind he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.

He rings up the sale and says, "That will be $34.50."

She says. "But didn't you say it was $20.00?"

He says, "Yes ma'am, the rod and reel is $20.00, the duck call is $11.00, and the catfish stink bait is $3.50.

Blind Farmer's Friend

Aiden, a blind farmer was often taken for a walk in the fields by his kind neighbor George. However kindly the neighbor might have been, he was undoubtedly a coward.

When a bull charged towards them one day, he abandoned his blind friend Aiden. The bull, puzzled by a lack of fear, nudged the farmer in the back. He turned very quickly, caught the bull by the horns and threw it to the ground with a bump that left it breathless.

"Aidan," said the neighbor, "I never knew you were so strong."

"George, if I could have gotten that fella off the handlebars of the bicycle I'd have thrashed him properly."

Sharp Tongued Grandma?

Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Frances Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife Margery, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Brewster Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife Ellery with three different women. One of them was your wife Margery. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,

'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.

its a wonderful life stills

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