Why Does God Allow Pain
Indianapolis Colts
NFL Coach Tony Dungy was the featured speaker, at the Athletes in
Action Breakfast, Detroit Michigan, the morning before Super Bowl XL
“It’s great to be here,” Dungy told the crowd, then
adding with a laugh, “I just wish I wasn’t here in this capacity so
many times of being just that close to being in the game and just being
an invited
speaker.
“My goal is to have our team here one day and have a couple of tables
with all of our guys here. Because we have a special group of young
men, a great group of Christian guys. It’d be wonderful
to have them here so you could see their hearts and what they’re all
about.
“It hasn’t quite happened yet, but we’re still hoping one day it will.”
He told them he was going to talk about lessons he had learned from his
three sons. The crowd fell silent. Then Dungy spoke.
And although this was a breakfast – and although at many such events
speakers speak over the clinking of glasses and murmurs from
semi-interested listeners – for most of the 15 minutes the room was
silent except for Dungy’s voice.
He spoke of his middle son, Eric, who he said shares his
competitiveness and who is focused on sports “to where it’s almost a
problem.” He spoke of his youngest son, Jordan, who has a rare
congenital condition which causes him not to feel pain.
“He feels things, but he doesn’t get the sensation of pain,” Dungy said.
The lessons learned from Jordan, Tony Dungy said, are many.
“That sounds like it’s good at the beginning, but I promise you it’s
not,” Dungy said. “We’ve learned a lot about pain in the last five
years we’ve had Jordan. We’ve learned some hurts are really necessary
for kids. Pain is necessary for kids to find out the difference between
what’s good and what’s harmful.”
Jordan, Dungy said, loves cookies.
“Cookies
are good,” Dungy said, “but in Jordan’s mind, if they’re good out on
the plate, they’re even better in the oven. He will go right in the
oven when my wife’s not looking, reach in, take the rack out, take the
pan out, burn his hands and eat the cookies and burn his tongue and
never feel it. He doesn’t know that’s bad for him.”
Jordan, Dungy said, “has no fear of anything, so we constantly have to
watch him.”
The lesson learned, Dungy said, is simple.
“You get the question all the time, ‘Why does the Lord allow pain in
your life? Why do bad things happen to good people? If God is a God of
love, why does he allow these hurtful things to happen?’’’ Dungy said.
“We’ve learned that a lot of times because of that pain, that little
temporary pain, you learn what’s harmful. You learn to fear the right
things.
“Pain sometimes lets us know we have a condition that needs to be
healed. Pain inside sometimes lets us know that spiritually we’re not
quite right and we need to be healed and that God will send that
healing agent right to the spot.
“Sometimes, pain is the only way that will turn us as kids back to the
Father.”
Finally, he spoke of James.
James Dungy, Tony Dungy’s oldest son, died three days before Christmas.
As he did while delivering James’ eulogy in December, Dungy on Saturday
spoke of him eloquently and steadily,
speaking of lessons learned and of the positives taken from experience.
“It was tough, and it was very, very painful, but as painful as it was,
there were some good things that came out of it,” Dungy said.
Dungy spoke at the funeral of regretting not hugging James the last
time he saw him, on Thanksgiving of last year.
“I met a guy the next day after the funeral,” Dungy said. “He said, ‘I
was there. I heard you talking. I took off work today. I called my son.
I told him I was taking him to the movies. We’re going to
spend some time and go to dinner.’ That was a real, real blessing to
me.”
Dungy said he has gotten many letters since James’ death relaying
similar messages.
“People heard what I said and said, ‘Hey, you brought me a little
closer to my son,’ or, ‘You brought me a little closer to my
daughter,’’’ Dungy said. “That is a tremendous blessing.”
Dungy also said some of James’ organs were donated through donors
programs.
“We got a letter back two weeks ago that two people had received his
corneas, and now they can see,’’ Dungy said. “That’s been a tremendous
blessing.”
Dungy also said he received a letter from a girl from the family’s
church in Tampa. She had known James for many years, Dungy said. She
went to the funeral because she knew James.
“When I saw what happened at funeral, and your family and the
celebration and how it was handled, that was the first time I realized
there had to be a God,” Dungy said the girl wrote. “I accepted Christ
into my life and my life’s been different since that day.”
Added Dungy, “That was an awesome blessing, so all of those things kind
of made me realize what God’s love is all about.”
Dungy also said he was asked often how he was able to return to the
Colts so quickly after James’ death. James died on December 22, and
Dungy returned to the team one week later. Dungy said
the answer was simple.
“People asked me, ‘How did you recover so quickly?”’’ Dungy said. “I’m
not totally recovered. I don’t know that I ever will be. It’s still
very, very painful, but I was able to come back because of
something one of my good Christian friends said to me after the funeral.
“He said, ‘You know James accepted Christ into his heart, so you know
he’s in heaven, right?’ I said, ‘Right, I know that.’ He said, ‘So,
with all you know about heaven, if you had the power to bring him back
now, would you?’ When I thought about it, I said, ‘No, I wouldn’t. I
would not want him back with what I know about heaven.’
“That’s what helped me through the grieving process. Because of
Christ’s spirit in me, I had that confidence that James is there, at
peace with the Lord, and I have the peace of mind in the midst
of something that’s very, very painful.
“That’s my prayer today, that everyone in this room would know the same
thing.”
# # #
Return HOME from Why Does
God Allow Pain
