Travel
Agent Tales
Why Americans
Shouldn't Be Allowed to Travel
From a travel agent:
1. I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair
wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
2. A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After
going over all the cost information, she asked, "Would it
be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to
Hawaii?"
3. A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked
what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was
expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not
possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He
replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida
is a very thin state."
4. I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to
see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said,
"But they look so close on the map."
5. Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in
Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a
1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent
a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I
need a car to drive between the gates to save time."
6. A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was
possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got
into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an
hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept
of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and
she bought that!
7. A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical
description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to
who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied,
"Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag
on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any
connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while
"I looked into it," (I was actually laughing) I came
back and explained that the city code for Fresno is FAT, and
that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her
luggage.
8. I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I
know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he
meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is
823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them.
9. "A woman called and said, "I need to fly to
Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." I asked if she
meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said,
"Yeah, whatever."
10. A woman called to make reservations. "I want to go from
Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York." The agent was at a loss
for words. Finally, the agent asked, "Are you sure that's
the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you
have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the
agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up
every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus
anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly.
Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent
scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered,
"You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I
knew it was a big animal."
