If I had My Life to Live Over

Legendary humorist Erma Bombeck shares her thoughts on life, looking back, at what she would have done differently if she could live her life over again. The choices made. The priorities and values. A heart felt look at what is important in life.

If I Had My Life to Live Over

by Erma Bombeck

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

If I had my life to live over, I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

little boy sitting in the grass

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television-and more while watching life.

If I had my life to live over, I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

If I had my life to live over, when my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner."

There would have been more "I love you's".. more "I'm sorry's" ....but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it ... live it...and never give it back.

Stop sweating the small stuff. Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.

Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who Do love us.

Let's think about what God HAS blessed us with.

Erma Bombeck Quotes

"I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage."

"There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt."

"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."

"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."

"Housework, if you do it right, will kill you."

"Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence."

"Never have more children than you have car windows."

two smiling little children

"The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again."

"Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother."

"When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911."

"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."

"Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I'm taking with me when I go."

"In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."



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