Feminine
Language
(Every
man's guide to understanding
and fostering
good communication with the opposite sex)
FINE: This
is the word we use at the end of any argument when we know we're
right, but we want you to be quiet. NEVER use fine to describe
how a woman looks.
FIVE MINUTES: This is half an hour. It is the equivalent
to the five minutes that your football game is going to last
before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
NOTHING: This means something and you should be on your
toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the
feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside
down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an
argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with a
huffy "Fine".
GO AHEAD: (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare, one
that will result in the female getting upset over
"Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".
LOUD SIGH: This is not actually a word, but is still
often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud
Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and
wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing
with you over "Nothing".
